While I still have one good leg to stand on....

A few weeks ago I was riding with Ruth, getting compliments on my leg placement and seat but when she approached me to to suggest a different placement for my foot (toe in) and moved my foot into position a pain shot through my knee and made a sound that gave us both a fright. This is the pain that I ride with, the one that sadly limits the time I am in the saddle and the one that really prevents me from progressing.

"How do you ride with your knee like that?", she asked. "With my foot like this (pointed more straight ahead) because it hurts any other way" I replied. In her stern voice she flat out told me that I needed to make a commitment and that if I intended to continue to ride I would get that knee fixed. On my ride home I thought about it and decided that Ruth was right. I could continue to ride like this, through the pain, and I might be able to make it another two years but then I'd be DONE! Or I could get it fixed and I might get another 10 years of riding. That night I told my husband that I was going to make the appointment I'd been dreading...to start the process of getting a knee replacement. He wasn't exactly happy with my reasoning (he would have preferred that it be because I wanted do something really important, like "walk") but he did agree that it was time...perhaps even well past time. I called the next day and made an appointment & their first available was 2/22.

Twelve years ago I was on a ski trip to Big Bear with my family. I KNEW skiing was not for me so the dog and I hung out while my Mom (yes, my MOM!), my son, my brother and his friend were all up on the hill. I was walking from the lodge to the observation deck across a gravel path that had iced over and I slipped, fell and twisted the heck out of my knee. We were just a couple of months away from moving to Washington state so while I did get it looked at 2 days later in Los Angeles, I decided to wait until I got to Washington to start the physical therapy that the doctor suggested. I got to Washington and no longer had insurance so I decided it could wait a little while longer. I babied it...a lot!

About 3 years later we bought a two-story house and within a month of using stairs every day the knee was toast. I had also fallen two more times and finally went to the doctor (because now I had insurance!). The menicus was not only torn (almost shredded) it was now dislodged and had fallen back behind my knee. I had surgery to trim up the tears and put it back into place but who knows how long I'd been walking on it with bone on bone action and there was already signs of damage. To top it off, I'd come to rely so much on my *good knee* that I'd damaged that one too (sounds like lameness issues, eh?). I was told that I needed TWO knee replacements but at my age (then turning 40 the next day) that they'd like to see me go as long as possible because the knee replacement at that time would only last 8-10 years and they could only replace it twice. So I toughed it out.

I started riding again (because that seems like a great idea for someone with a severe knee injury right?) at the age of 45. When I got serious and hired Chrissy as my trainer I noted that I was good for about 30 minutes before the pain started to slow me down. As I worked up to 40 minutes and then a full hour, I really felt my riding was improving. I started doing schooling shows and rode for a few hours, but not continuously. Then came some trail riding and did a couple of 2-3 hour trail rides where I thought I was going to blow out the knee ON THE TRAIL and hoped Coconut would be able to get me back. Most of you probably know that going down steep hills is hard on the knees but once you're up there, you have to get back down and what was I going to do, get off and walk back? So yes...I suppose it was time to get serious about this and enter the program to get the knee fixed.

Over the last year I did start to address the problem by consulting an Orthopedic surgeon who started me on Synvisc injections. Synvisc is basically (as I understand it) purified chicken fat that, when injected into the knee, creates lubrication and less friction between the bones. Those are supposed to last up to 6 months and the first round seemed to have some good results. The second round was not as successful. I got injected days before I left for the World Equestrian Games were I walked extensively every day. I knew a week into it that I wasn't getting much relief from it, but I pushed on.

I tend to sit pseudo-yoga style at my desk and about 4 days after my conversation with Ruth, I was working at the computer and went to unwind my legs but discovered that I could fully extend my knee and could barely put any weight on it. I had no choice but to break out the crutches and was on them for the next 36 hours.  The next morning I called Dr. Hunter's office and told them that even though I had an appointment in a week, I really felt like I was having an unexpected urgent issue and they were able to fit me in early the next morning. Of course when I woke up for that appointment, the problem seemed resolved but I didn't know what could trigger it next so I kept the appointment anyway.

They took a series of x-rays and Dr. Hunter came in within a few minutes and said, "I don't know how you even walked in here today" ... the knee is completely blown. He said if he didn't know me, he'd say it was the knee of a 78 year old (about 30 years off!!!) and shook his head saying there was nothing he could do but replace it. Apparently it's covered in bone spurs and too damaged to try to treat. He asked if I could clear the next 6-8 weeks and since I happen to be in a position to do that, he put me at the top of his list and I got a call later that day that they scheduled me for Monday the 28th, just 10 days away at that point. No time to go through the seminar, prep classes or any of that...get in and do it, pretty much, NOW!

When I told him I wanted to ride at least another 10 years, he said, "Why not 15-20?" and I smiled BIG and said "OK!" There will, however, be no running in my future (oh darn...bwahaha) but riding pleasure, trails and some dressage would be ok. No Jumping though! Hey...I'm starting to sound like Bucky B Lucky! I knew we were kindred spirits. In fact I went to visit him on Friday and he kept sniffing my knee. How weird is that? Do you think he knew? Maybe when we're both all better, we can team up for a ride. That would be amazing!

A little Lucky Love before I go off to fix my leg. You next handsome!

So projects that I'd been looking at doing over the next few months either had to go on hold or get done in a hurry! The last week has been a whirlwind of stuff that I felt pressured to do. Now it's hours away from when I need to leave for the hospital and I'm looking around thinking that I guess some of it will just have to wait until I can get to it. I did what I can...it's time to get better!

I'm not too worried about the procedure. I have a highly recommended surgeon and my own personal recovery nurse. It turns out that my friend Becka, who's mare Autumn was my first lesson horse at Chrissy's & is now Coconut's neighbor on the other side at the barn, is a recovery room nurse and she has a plan for me! I will be in good hands all the way through this so nothing to fear...and every thing to gain, I think! I'm starting to consider how much more relaxed I can be in the saddle once I am out of pain. I know there is a LOT of work I will have to do to get rehabbed from the surgery and get used to the new knee but I have every reason to believe that if I can power through the pain to ride and do the things I love, then I should have no problem applying myself to, what some call, a difficult recovery. I'm pretty tenacious... but I also know that I could be writing "omg, this is the hardest thing I've ever done" posts later. I hope someone will cut and paste this back to me if I do turn into a screaming/crying mess. Maybe Ruth can come over and remind me how committed I need to be...you know...if I am serious about this riding thing.

Tonight I'm hopeful. Tomorrow I'll sleep it off & then it's on to a new adventure!

Oh What Fun It Is To Ride

With just a few days to go until Christmas it seems like excellent planning that I could just check out of the holiday madness and head for the trails on the Sunday before. Not that I had all my gifts wrapped...or even purchased, for that matter...but our friend Kathleen decided to organize a ride with some of us gals connected to SAFE & I was way on board for some trail fun.

The planing started weeks ago and we all watched as the weather forecast went from rainy to snowy and back to rainy. We decided that it could take all the way until that morning to decide NOT to do it but went ahead and planned that it would happen. Friday was a lovely day and the weekend still looked to be pretty miserable. I kept wishing that Friday could have been held over for Sunday but wouldn't you know it, the sun was out and the sky was blue Sunday morning as I headed to the barn to hook up the trailer, load up Coconut and her gear and head out.

One small problem; there was a horrible patch of black ice on the road in front of the barn. In fact, someone from our barn skidded off the road and her family was all parked out on the main road trying to help her out as I drove up at 9am. I wasn't going fast at all but even when I breaked to make the turn, the back end of the truck started to slide and so took my foot off the break and just coasted to the next intersection where I could make a U-turn and head back to the driveway. I hoped that the 2 hours before I needed to be on my way would give enough time for the sun to melt the roadway down enough for me to get out to Taylor Mountain.

Thankfully, the road was driveable and I was able to get out there safely. I actually had no road problems until I actually hit the Hobart/Issaqua exit where it was still shady and there was still ice, but thankfully I had the good sense to slow way down for the exit and we made it fine.

When I got to the trailer parking lot, Everyone was already there, which made my decision to back into the one remaining space a little stressful. I not only had to fit in but had to do it in front of my friends! Kathleen did offer to back it in for me but I managed (albeit slightly crooked) to get myself respectfully in.




Kathleen brought her horse Apollo & offered up her three other horses, Captain, Fancy & Dallas as mounts for Monica, Sara & Allison while Lynn brought Kitty. Once we were all saddled up, we headed up for our adventure.



Coconut does "OK" late in the pack, but not necessarily THE back horse. Sara &Fancy initially brought up the back but Fancy wasn't liking that position too well either and ended up moving up towards the front with her friend, Captain, with Monica aboard. Apollo & Dallas pretty much stayed in the middle for most of the trip and about the time we picked up a spare dog (much to the dismay of his owner) Dallas was not a happy camper and gave Allison quite a ride, testing all of her riding skills but thankfully she had the balance to ride it out and stayed on. Once the dog left and Dallas settled down Allison's ride became much more enjoyable for her.



Eventually Lynn & Kitty fell back and rode with Coconut and I and for the rest of the trip we had 3 very well matched riding pairs, horse & human wise, I believe!

The scenery was absolutely lovely. We had the sun shining in the blue skies, some beautiful trails and in some places we still had snow on the ground so it made for a very enjoyable and diverse experience. Coconut had to cross water and although she did tense up a little, she followed her new horse friends pretty well. Not bad for her first time...at least it wasn't very long or deep. At one point I saw Kathleen entering what looked like a lake and my inner alarm went right off....I don't think the teeny tiny creek victory in any way prepared us for something of that size...but I watched as Monica & Sara both entered while Allison seemed to be staying back. As Lynn & I caught up I saw what I thought was Fancy sinking into water. I was starting to panic a bit thinking we were going to have to rescue this horse from some soft mud or something. Sara bailed off into the icy cold water, thankfully landing on her feet so only her boots, half chaps & the lower legs of her breeches were wet (about knee deep) and that's when it hit me that she was standing next to Fancy who was now in up to her belly...about then Kathleen came back over saying "I forgot to warn you...." it turns out that Fancy likes to LAY IN WATER....even icy water wearing a saddle & a rider!!!! Fancy got back up and had muddy legs but thankfully no one had to be rescued and Sara, a great sport, hopped back on and rode the rest of the ride with wet legs & feet. What a trooper!!


Coconut was "pretty good"....she spooked when we were the last horse in line and a tree snapped. She started to refuse me when I discovered that I had dropped my crop (obviously I hadn't needed it & couldn't even remember when I last had it in my hand) but got herself pulled together and proceeded on within a few moments. HOWEVER....the only time Coconut has kicked another horse was on a ride with Kim and Mercedes, a lovely black Tennessee Walking Horse mare about a year and a half ago....until yesterday...She took aim and made contact with Apollo, who also happens to be a black Tennessee Walking Horse. Do we see a pattern here? What's up with that??? I was completely embarrassed because normally she's a pretty docile mare unless someone gets in her face....she doesn't like horses to touch her face (except Sugar, of course!) but after her kick, the war was on.... She kept giving little "warning" bucks his way & Apollo gave a few pseudo attitude moves at her but at one of the switch backs Lynn &  I were in the middle with Kathleen & Allison behind us. As we made the turn, Coconut flashed a look of hatred at Apollo and it made Kathleen and Allison both gasp and laugh at her...good grief!!



The rest of the ride was actually pretty calm, although I clearly need to get out and do this more. The loop took about 3 hours and I was pretty well DONE at the end. Between the cold air and the climbing and descending, my knees were toast. Today my whole body ached but it was a *Happy Hurt* and I'd do it all again in a heart beat. In fact, this is almost a tradition. It was the Sunday before Christmas last year as well that we went out and did the SAFE Poker ride at Bridle Trails. I'm all for making it a yearly ride!

Coconut wanted to know if we could Pleeeeeeeeeeaze Go Home!!!

A Lucky Break & Thumbs Up For Safety

It’s time to practice typing so what better way to do so than to write my latest blog entry?

So…. Saturday morning, Lynn came to pick up Coconut and I to go on a trail ride down in Orting along the river with Kim. I got all my gear loaded up and went to lead the princess into the trailer & she bolted backwards. I’ve heard that term before but never fully understood what it meant until then.

Normally she walks right in any trailer and I have never had a problem since day one that we hauled her home to KCJ. We’ve been on plenty of adventures with many different horses and trailers. While she’s never hauled with Kitty or Lynn, she’s certainly met them both before so this was nothing new. I’ve replayed the whole thing in my head over and over and I can’t say what caused it…We walked in pretty calmly, the trailer tie safety hook was closed so I draped my (safely “folded”) lead rope over my arm and reached up with both hands to undo the hook from the sliding safety latch. Kitty, who was happily munching on hay & already clipped in turned her head to us and let out a greeting but it didn’t seem all that aggressive and Coconut’s reaction wasn’t immediate so I’m not convinced that was it either but she went flying backwards and I reacted by reaching back with my right hand to grab the lead. I caught it thumbs-down and she managed to pull it through my hands, stopping behind the trailer.

Of course, I’m thinking “NO WAY!” and reached back again with my right hand to grab the rope but my hand couldn’t grasp it. I thought maybe it was stunned for a moment and reached with my left hand to grab the rope to lead her in and she stepped up but again bolted backward. This time I took a deep breath to clear my head and try to figure out how we were going to get past this and happened to look down at my right hand…it wasn’t looking right. In fact, my pinky finger was bent to the left and poking my ring finger at an odd angle. I looked at my left hand to compare and they did not match at all.

I asked Lynn what she thought and she thought it might be just the joint and maybe if she pulled it and put it back, we could tape it and still ride. In a sane world I don’t think I’d let anyone pull my finger even it if wasn’t injured!! But at that moment, all I wanted to do was ride and so I held my hand out to her, granting permission…the moment she pulled (very gently, I might add) I knew it was not the joint. I felt movement in my bone between the base of my finger and that large knuckle. I informed her that she was going to have to go on to the ride without me and I was going to head to a doctor. We unloaded the gear and put Coconut away. Lynn splinted my finger with supplies from my Equine First Aid kit and then I called Kim to apologize for not making it. I assured Lynn I was fine and that she really should go. I was REALLY annoyed with myself at that point...but surprisingly calm!

I have this total hate-affair with the Emergency Room at St. Francis so I’ll do just about anything to avoid it. I remembered that the UW Clinic had Saturday hours so I called to plead with them to let me come in for an x-ray but that I was sure it was broken (they tend to get annoyed with me when I call and tell them what’s wrong with me and what they need to do…they’ve told me in the past that “they’d” like to diagnose my problems themselves, please…but I’m never wrong, fyi!) so the first thing out of the coordinator’s mouth after she pulls up my record is “My, you seem to have a lot of home injuries!”… Realizing what she’s alluding to, I correct her…”NO, I have a horse” (besides, my husband is out of town and these things often happen when he’s no where around!) She goes on to tell me how she’s afraid of horses & amazed she is at how funny I am considering I have a broken finger and all…what was I supposed to do? Cry? It donned on me that it hadn’t actually hurt yet…

Unfortunately, it turned out that their x-ray machine was not working so she was going to try to get me in at the Kent-Des Moines clinic and would have them call me if they could fit me in. She wished me luck and was practically laughing when we hung up…I don’t think I was that funny…. but she was amused & that was at least keeping things lighthearted. So I continued home as it was on they way to the other clinic and I’d wait there for their call. When they finally called their coordinator was not as amused with me and actually delivered the news that they really felt that this was more serious than they were equipped to resolve so instructed me to go to the ER at St. Francis. Boo-Hiss! This is not how I wanted to handle it. I thought my plan was so much simpler.

My biggest problem with St. Francis has nothing to do with the facility or the staff…in fact; they’re all very nice and helpful there. My issue is that there are some people who practically live there. They use it as their main medical office and clutter up the waiting room with their troop of (slightly?) ill kids. I don’t mean several families…I mean one mother with her four kids…who all have the sniffles today. The last time I was forced to go there (practically kicking and screaming!), I had burned my hand at about 10pm and waited there for FOUR hours behind a woman who brought in her kids, one who had been hit by a car in their apartment parking lot (ok…. I’m not being insensitive here…even the mother claimed it was at a slow speed!) at 4:30pm…but since she was coming into the ER anyway, she brought all of her kids in to be checked out…they had coughs. nasty coughs that they didn’t seem to care to cover…. but no one looked like they were dying or in pain. They were chasing each other around the room and causing problems. Meanwhile I AM in pain (the kind that did make me cry) from a burn to my hand. The misuse of the ER just gets my typically low blood pressure way up. This was probably a Monday or Tuesday and they could have easily gotten an appointment with a Pediatrician the next day…or taken the kid who got hit by the car to the ER at, say 4:45 – 5:00pm (that’s what I’d do…ya know…if it were MY Kid!)

So I grabbed Corey to keep me company but when we got there I honestly didn’t have to wait more than 5 minutes and there were only two people in the waiting room at 11:30am. I got in, the took some x-rays & I managed to whack my head on the overhead x-ray camera, which is still a little sore (I know…I know…can’t take me anywhere!) but we were able to determine that, YES! it was broken. They showed me the break…a diagonal starting from under the big knuckle on the inside and continuing across down toward the outside of my right Pinky to the base. The PA did remark that who ever did my splint did a nice job! YAY!!

By this time I was loosing my sense of humor. She said the adrenaline was probably wearing off and since I seemed a bit grumpier than when I arrived she asked if I’d like something for the pain…it was sore but didn’t seem to hurt but then I have kind of a high threshold for pain (must be the practice!) and it occurred to me that it just might start hurting really bad at some point very soon so I opted for a local nerve block which would numb it for 8 hours and I figured that would probably keep me pain free until almost bed time! YAY! They splinted it with a softer splint than the tongue depressor that Lynn had snapped in half & sent me on my merry way with a referral to Orthopedics on Monday.

As we were getting ready to leave the staff was discussing a Mom and her brood of three kids with colds who were there again…for the millionth time this week (I have to wonder if it was the same Mom from several years ago but it’s probably just another family who’s learned to use the ER as their general practice office.) I was in and out in less than an hour so my timing must have been perfect because the waiting room now held 20 or more people (or maybe just three families…who knows!...my blog, my rant...sorry...)

The block worked great and I actually went out to lunch with Corey & then headed back to the barn to hang out. That night, however, I could tell the block was wearing off so I nested with the home pets, Lola, Buddha & Captn’ Jack and took something a little stronger to relax. The plan to sleep through the pain actually worked. I KNOW… you’re expecting a better story than that…but this time it went just as I planned.

So Monday comes along and I go to the Orthopedics appointment and Dr. Wells tells me that we did such a good job of splinting that we avoided surgery. I promptly gave all the props to Lynn for pulling it and Dr. Wells said she should into Orthopedics because she did a great job of resetting it. Normally that type of break…spiral AND diagonal…would have required resetting and pinning! YAY Lynn!!!!!! Whew!!! Yay for me too. I was worried about that.

Dr. Wells offered me the choice of a “petite” cast or a two-finger splint. I told her that I intended to ride and that I had a show in 2.5 weeks so she bargained with me that if I would agree to the cast, she’d remove it prior to the show and evaluate afterward. Typically she would like it immobilized 3-4 weeks. So I have a cast…a bright pink one that I’m having a challenge in trying to color coordinate with! Today I just ignored it and went with my favorite black/red winter wear!

Oh...and the irony of it all...One day I win a national contest that's centered on Safe Riding with Helmets and the next day I'm in the ER with a horse-related injury....It could be worse, as someone pointed out, it could have been a brain scan instead!! Still...it does take me down a notch in my Coconut Week High...but mostly I was upset that I missed the river ride...now it's kind of settled in and life with a cast is not as fun as it could be if I was actually trying to get out of doing something. Age & life have a way of changing how you see things. There's not much I'd prefer NOT to do....I'm living my life pretty full and this slows things way down!

I have asked myself what did “I” do wrong in this situation. I folded, not looped, my lead rope, I walked into the trailer and she followed but somehow when the unexpected occurred I got injured and I’d like not to do that again so here’s my take…

I’m calling it “Thumbs Up For Safety”

Normally when I hold a lead I have my hand between the horse and the rope, my fingers closed around the rope with my thumb on top. I’d never given it much thought and when I passed the thought by my trainer she didn’t really have an immediate reaction either…but… when my horse went backwards, my reaction was to follow the horse in a sweeping motion away from myself and toward the horse, placing my hand ahead of the horse and rope, with my fingers closed around it and my thumb pointing down.

A "Thumbs Down" to the Thumbs Down Hold

I do have a bit of history with this particular pinky…it was injured (yes, a totally separate injury from many years ago) in a glass accident where all the tendons to my right hand were severed. After having them all surgically reattached, the tendons to the pinky and ring finger welded together as they healed. They don’t work completely independent from each other and the pinky basically has no strength on it’s own.

So when I caught the lead rope and tried to give it pressure…while she was pulling back…she, being the stronger of the two, yanked the rope harder and it drew my weak and defenseless little pinky back across the top of my hand…it twisted & snapped.

What would I do different?

To start off with, we’re going to work on some trailer loading just to be sure she’s still good. I, however, will focus on keeping my thumb pointed up when I have hold of the lead rope and I will try to remember that I do not possess the strength and power to physically stop a fast moving horse with my hand. It’s going to take trying to keep control of the situation & being safety conscious. I actually thought I was being safe but I’ve also learned that safety must be practiced before it’s performed in a stressful situation...Like all those one-rein stops Chrissy had me practice have come in several times! I’m glad I didn’t have to think about it…we drilled it until it was second nature. Coconut learned it too. One day when she broke into a canter that she wasn’t comfortable with, we took about four strides before it occurred to her that we were cantering and she turned her head all the way to the left and basically one rein stopped herself when she lost her confidence and got scared. I had to laugh at her…but her heart was beating fast and I could tell it wasn’t just defiance…it was her way of correcting something she scared of, but there she was with her nose on my boot, just as we’d done so many times before.

Probably the better hold!?

And maybe you don’t have a weak pinky and are just fine with the thumbs down hold but I’m sharing this with you because when I mentioned it to Ken, he said lots of horse people break their pinkies in the exact same way…so maybe it’s a coincidence but I’m not taking any chances, especially now that I’ll have a weakness there anyway because of this break…a “Lucky Break”? Maybe…. but I sure to have to “Hand” it to Lynn for saving me from surgery!

I’m giving her a big PINK thumbs Up!!